Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Me and the Army

Save your best striving for Seeking My Face:
Things I strive for in no particular order
Losing weight
Having a nice home
Being a loving wife
Being fit
Being an exceptional mom
Being a strong Christian
Being a good friend
I am ashamed to say that I hardly ever ever have “seeking God” on that list. I do seek Him. I seek him in my thoughts and my prayers and our conversations. But not the way I seek the other things. I can research diet tips and exercise moves for hours on end on the computer. I can spend hours in a TJ max or online looking at design ideas. I can talk to my friends for hours or spend time reading books about childcare. You get the idea.  After all that, I don’t have my best to offer God. I have what’s left over. I have good intentions but more often than not that is where it ends up.
I want to strive to seek God’s face. About everything. About losing weight or taking care of my daughter and my husband. I want to seek Him in how to be a good wife or a good friend.  Most of the time I just think I know how to do it. ON MY OWN. One of the first things I learned when I chose to walk with Lord was that I can’t do it on my own. EVER. Why is it so easy to forget that? Why is it so easy to think I know it all? Or that my friends know it all or that website know it all?  I know that God has given me a beautiful community of different personalities and points of view. But He gave me Him first. His word second. His holy spirit.
God’s word says that anything I desire more than him becomes an idol. When I was in high school I went on a retreat to West Palm with my youth group. Our youth leader had us wear a plastic army figurine around our neck the entire week. When we slept. When we ate. When we showered. When we hung out with friends.  It got in my way. I eventually took it off because it irritated me so much. People looked at us funny because we were on the only ones with green army men hanging from our necks. At the end of the week our youth leader told us that it was there to represent what an idol does to our relationship with the Lord. IT GETS IN THE WAY. Something clicked.
Now some 10 years later my life is cluttered with idols. Idols that are getting in the way of glorifying the Lord.  It is time for some spring cleaning of my mind and heart…
"If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Matthew 6:33 The Messege

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